Thursday, October 8, 2009


Just got back from another basketball game... pulled something in my neck almost immediately (can't look to the left right now), but it was fun to run around and stuff. I might be going to Philly to see the orchestra play Berlioz' Symphoy Fantastique tomorrow or Saturday, not sure yet. I was going to run the Baltimore 5K on Saturday morning, but it sold out right before my boss called me to confirm that I had that morning off. Go figure.

I don't know how other people experience this sort of thing (or even if they do), but I've always been fairly keen on what one would call "gut feelings". For me, it's just something that lingers in the background of whatever your thinking of... but sometimes, if you notice it, it will be glaringly obvious how a situation will turn out. It could be as stupid as a game of rock-paper-scissors, bringing your hand down and thinking "oh, I'm going to win this one" (which you do), or as crazy as Kei Maeda (a fellow percussionist at Peabody who doesn't really play basketball) dribbling a basketball at half-court, saying "I'm going to make this one. I feel it." (He made that half-court shot--and only that one).

The fact of the matter is, at least for me, they're there. You can't look for it, you can't fabricate it--it's just there, and you have to get lucky enough to notice it. It was the feeling I had going into my senior year of school--I thought my hands were good enough to go back to playing, but something just didn't feel right. Turns out, I wasn't ready to go back into playing full time. Same thing happened this year, and I was in way better shape than last year. Something just didn't feel right, and lo and behold--I injured myself playing with So.

But today, while playing snare drum, I caught myself thinking about how happy I was to be playing back in the studio, with Vikki (another percussionist, obviously) also playing in the room next to me. We both would always be practicing at the same time before we got injured, and it was nice to be doing it again. Then all the sudden, the thought crossed my mind:

"I'll really look forward to it next semester, when I'm completely healed."

That's when I realized...that gut anxiety I've had is gone. Even though I'm injured right now, it's gone. Suddenly it was just granted that everything would be back to normal. That normally doesn't happen that way, at least for me.

I dunno. I think a sign is a sign. I'm going to heed that sign...I like what it's saying. Of course, I'll still be careful--that's part of the deal. But I'll keep my head up, shoulders back, and just keep moving forward.

Just as soon as I get my neck looked at. Ow.

No comments:

Post a Comment